My Quest To Teach

October 12, 2016

Social Media Sex and Daughters

Social Media Sex and Daughters
by William Jackson, M.Ed.
Parent, Educator, Speaker
Community Activist  #MyQuestToTeach

“Fathers if you fail to teach your daughters
the value of their bodies, the awesome
mental capabilities that make them smart
creatives and thought leaders, helping your
daughters to understand their personal sexuality
and seeing their value based on their talents and
abilities not sex. If you fail to teach as fathers,
you may be committing a travesty with life-long
consequences.” William Jackson

As a parent, educator and heavily involved in
Social Media I see the elements of Social Media
Sexting, mental and sexual manipulation, sexual
bullying and self-destruction. Girls and women
must understand that just because you can post
hundreds of “selfies” and “sexties” does not
mean you do so.

Telling your story through your digital content should
come with the knowledge that people will see what
you create and judge you based on the creativity and
innovation you show. This creativity should be done
with wisdom, purpose and common sense.  Parents
make dangerous mistakes by letting their children
have free reign of the Internet without behavioral
expectations and rules. The World Wide Web
can be the Wild Wild West with content that can
range free either on the extreme Left or Right.

There are communities that are represented on
platforms that allow the diversity of the human
mind create places that are comforting and at
the same time can cause the soul to shiver.
Girls especially are attracted to the chance to
“show” themselves beyond their “personalities.”
#ShirleyChisholm
“I’ am, was always will be a catalyst for change”
but that change must be positive and productive.

This blog “Social Media Sex and Daughters” shares
the value of parenting when girls are young and
impressionable, they do not understand the value
to share that they are more than their bodies. There
is more to girls than a size, color, a shape, cleavage,
or how sexy they can look. Perceptions are dangerous
in the digital age. Fathers must be sure to teach their
daughters the “tricks” of the game boys will use to get
into their daughters __________.

A father has a responsibility not to scare their daughters,
but to educate them on sex and sexuality. Mothers count,
but they are not men.  Daughters cannot afford to learn
from their friends either boys or girls to protect their
“pocketbooks” as the senior women like to reference.
What is private, is private and should be protected….

Social Media provides wonderful networking, and
communication opportunities, girls and women are
participating in coding – Black Girls Code, learning
how to use tech to be entrepreneurs while attending
conferences like Blogging While Brown, networking
in groups like Black Girls Rock, learning socialization
skills in groups like  Girls Inc, Journey Into Womanhood
Empowerment Resources (Jacksonville, Florida) and
Black Girls Book Club.

The online development of collaboration and connectivity
grows to help girls grow cognitively and raise their
self-esteems and self-respect. No longer do girls and
women say tech is just for boys and men, girls
and women are coding, creating dynamic content,
writing books, managing publishing companies. Girls
are thought leaders, and entrepreneurs, Black girls
can proudly claim their BLERD and Geek profiles.
African girls and women are growing into AfiBlerds
and AfriGeeks proudly earning degrees, they are
owning businesses like Anie Akpe, CEO/Publisher
of http://innov8tiv.com/

My Black Matters ‏@MyBlackMatters “All Black girls
matter whether they’re dark skin, light skin, brown
skin, mixed, hood, nerdy, preppy, loud, quiet or ratchet.”

Business opportunities are increasing so girls and
women should not focus on their body image they
should focus on their Brand and the Marketing aspects.
Women are networking, they are serving on boards,
in committees, forming nonprofits, and educational
initiatives.
Their Brands are worth more than gold, it is the
foundation of their existence and should always be
treated respectfully.
Girls like Jacksonville’s Taylor Richardson and
Natalie McGriff and others are inspiring other
girls to grasp hold of their dreams and grow wings
to fly beyond societal limitations and
exceed expectations no matter color and culture.

nat and taylor 2

Fathers must have those conversations about
pride, hard work, dignity, trust, ethics, morals
and values. Parents must monitor their daughter’s
online activities, not out of fear, but to preserve
reputations and the developing Brands of the
future. It must be taught that, ”sex is a
temporary physical manifestation of temporary
pleasure that if unchecked can be dangerous and
self-destructive.”

Social Media is shaping the way girls and women
are viewing themselves and interacting with
each other. “There are generations coming up
that will not know a time without being connected.
” William Jackson, Edward Waters College 2016

20160611_132716
Advertisers know this and will market “sexulization
of girls” through advertising. Talking about sex
and sexuality should be a discussion not a scare
tactic. Parents should share
the reality of pornography, it is not the sensual
event of dreams; it can be violent, degrading and
demeaning.
Girls and women will not get cultural and educational
validation by having multiple sexual partners. The
marketing aspect too look hot, be popular, risque,
sexy, vulnerable/aggressive, girls of color and
culture are not presented in positive situations
when it comes to sex like their white counterparts.

Parents of all colors and culture start early and
have conversations so girls feel comfortable,
confident in who they are and where
they are going in life. Parents talk to your daughters
as they mature, have honest and tough discussions.
Before any girl or young woman gets into bed with
anyone, even in alternative lifestyle’s they need
to get into that persons head first to make sure
they are not making a mistake that will curse them
through adult life.
A girl’s reputation can be destroyed with a single
video, a single picture posted online and even a flash
of experimentation. Put your value ahead of being
popular, being seen as sexy and been just seen as
who you are and what your aspiring to be.

Girls are growing into not just Black Girl Magic or
Women Magic, but Awesome Women of Magic.

girl-magic
Black Girl Magic and Women Magic Resources:
Jalesa Ann @jalesaann
Anie Akpe @AnieAkpe
Fran Siracusa @ProfeEdTech
Melanin Mamis @melaninmamis
#EduMatch @edu_match
Michelle @Michell49246814
Ashley Hill @prepforcollege
#EdWalk 4 CFE @zansari8
Black Girl Nerds @BlackGirlNerds
Black Girls Book Club @bg_bookclub
Bess Auer @Bess_Auer
Sarah Thomas @sarahdateechur
Rusul الربيعي @RusulAlrubail
Barbara KV Johnson @DrBKVJ
Rachel Vitti @rachelvitti
Tara Reed @TaraReed_
Jennifer Williams @JenWilliamsEdu
Black Girl Nerds @BlackGirlNerds
Valerie Lewis @iamvlewis
Jedidah Isler, PhD @JedidahIslerPhD
Gina Humber @ghumber720
Melissa Ross @MelissainJax
Ale’ta Turner @AletaTurner
Sherry Smith Gray @sherisaid
Soumya @SoumyaNukala
Deena Pierott @deenapierott
SocaMom® @SocaMomDC
Empowerment Resources @EmpowermentJax
Ronique Gibson @stagetecture
Coach Jeanna Brown @CoachJeanna
Hey Black Girl @Hey_BlackGirl
PASSION4CHRIST @p4cToyaG
Mickee Brown @MickeeBrown
Black Bloggers Connect @JoinBBC
My Black Matters ‏@MyBlackMatters
Danyelle Little @TheCubicleChick
Asktnd @asktnd
FLBlogCon @FLBlogCon
Ivy Box™ @MsIvyBox
Blogging Black Miami @blogblackmiami
Brown Girls Unite @BGU_Official
Tracee Ellis Ross @TraceeEllisRoss
Marcie Hill @Marcie_Hill
Sheena White @sheenamwhite
Sea World Mommy @SeaWorldMommy
Sili @MyMamihood
Blogger Week @BloggerWeek
African Women In Tech @AfricanWIT

dad and shae
My daughter and I years ago in Palatka, Florida

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August 10, 2015

Ways to Be An Involved and Engaged Father This School Year

Ways to Be An Involved and Engaged Father This School Year

A new school year is quickly approaching; the excitement for
some students is building and the dread of another year of rigor
and regularity for others.

Families are finishing up vacations, promised adventures,
and fun family activities. Fathers are excited about the school
year and with changing parental responsibilities an increasing
number of fathers are taking responsibilities for the needs of
their children.
News reports in some cases have society thinking that fathers
cannot match the intrinsic and instinctual abilities of mothers,
fathers are doing awesome jobs in raising their children either
as single parents, married, with partners, or even the reality
of alternative lifestyles. Fathers are very important in helping
to raise children and laying a foundation for the importance
of education.

As a parent and educator here are some ways that fathers can
be engaged in the new school year, many have already been
doing these and more. The first step is wanting to be a father
and accepting the responsibility to be a responsible, active,
engaged, loving and dedicated father.
Fathers are learning that they are enjoying the role and
accountability of being a father. It is not just a job, but a life
of joy, happiness, bonding and recognitions that they are part
of something bigger than they are.

Being a father leaves no room for selfishness, it requires
continuous giving, generosity, kindness, compassion, empathy,
love and dedication to another life besides their own. Fathers
are doing this every day without recognition praise,
acknowledgement and thanks, but they
continue to perform because they love their children.

“Fathers can and do change the world one child at a time.”
William Jackson, M.Edu.


William Jackson and Shae Jackson, graduate of
Palatka High School

Suggestions from a father, educator, mentor and community activist.
1. Fathers respect your child’s teacher(s)
One way to support education is to model respect for teachers and
administrators. Fathers speak more by their actions than words, so
visit schools and praise teachers and administrators.

2. Fathers spend time in the school
Even though it might be tough to visit schools at least once a month it
makes a world of difference in a child’s behavior and academic success.
Spending time means sacrificing a lunch time, overtime or buddy time.
The rewards are great, just look in your child’s eyes and see.

3. Fathers listen to teachers not talk at them
Sometimes it is more valuable to listen than to speak. Fathers must
trust teachers to tell them the truth about their children even if the
truth hurts or challenges making changes to discipline, doing homework,
requiring tutors or not participating in sports or after school activities.
The priority of school is education.

4. Fathers discipline with Love
Many of us have humorous stories of being disciplined when we were
of youthful vigor and energy. We understood later we were wrong in
some of our actions and choices and that discipline was done with love.
So fathers must continue to have love in their hearts and minds and
discipline fairly and with love.

5. Fathers are Role Models
Fathers are the first role models, even when we don’t think our kids are
watching, they are and other kids do too. So our actions speak louder
than words. We can’t say “do as I say and not do as I do” because we
send the wrong messages and set our actions and words up to be
hypocritical and without meaning.

6. Fathers are Teachers
When a father teaches it is by his actions not always by his words.
The first teacher should be the child’s parents. They establish the
foundation for future success. Even is not a great student in school
fathers can teach their children from their mistakes to help their
children to be better academically and behaviors.

7. Fathers should share meals
A great time to share is when eating together. This is a relaxing time
to joke, share, encourage, engage in fun conversation. Sharing meals
should not be serious times, but memorable ones starting with prayer.

8. Fathers Read to their Children
When my children where toddlers until middle school their mother
and I read to them at various times during the day and when it was
bed time. This created an atmosphere where reading was fun. When
they were able to we allowed them to read to us. Even though we
divorced I still read to my children to keep the consistency and fun
of it. Fathers that are not strong readers should read to their level
and build as their children build. Learning together should not be
an embarrassment it should be a cooperative effort to show
comprehension and literacy are vital.

9. Fathers Show Affection
Fathers cannot afford to be “hard” and unemotional, this creates
unstable emotional behaviors in children that cause confusion and
conflicting emotions for stability and expression. Fathers have to
model love, proper affection, sensitivity, common sense, compassion,
tenderness. These are what children need to learn to function in
society.

10. Fathers Job is Never Done
At the time of this writing 2015 both my children are in college,
working, driving and in some capacity they are still dependent on
me. Fathering is a lifelong responsibility even when children are
maturing into adults themselves. Fathers are the cushions, the barriers
that God has placed to make the world less scary, less threatening and
less depressing when the challenges of life attack our children.

Children need to know that daddy will be there not just for money,
but for encouragement, advice, praise, love, prayers and sometimes
just a silent shoulder to listen and arms for reassuring hugs.
Fathers you must decide what kind of father you want to be, it is
a choice and personal decision.


Sean – Shae – William
Attending World of Nations in Jacksonville, Florida

Sean attending Florida State University
Shae attending University of Central Florida
William teaching with Duval County Public Schools
and Instructor with Edward Waters College teaching
Educational Technology / STEAM / Social Media

Mentoring Children in my community…

Supporting the Jacksonville Jaguars 2014
Mentoring is a great way to get kids involved in positive
activities…..

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